Pain should be stashed where no one can reach it

Hello there , old friend. Smoke screens and coffee steam and two screens separate this voluntary virtual meeting between us . Let us proceed to have yet another empty conversation where our words are pregnant with insinuations and we care more than we know we should and yet we let on nothing in this nonchalant exchange of nonsensical pleasantries. The word we really want to and need to speak are dancing underneath our tongues as our fingertips slide underneath letters . Here's everything I wanted to say to you and I never really will.
I wish we used to be the kind of friends we were five years ago , I wish you'd pick up when I called, I wish you'd text back and not shut me out , I wish what I did to save myself didn't break you till you wanted nothing to do with me.
Have a wonderful birthday , I wish you were spending it with me.